Trading ARod: The Full Rundown By Blogger

Recent Development 1: The Yankees acquired Bobby Abreu over the weekend, and he will probably improve their offense significantly.

Recent Development 2: They also acquired Cory Lidle in the deal. Replacing Sir Sidney with Lidle is a solid upgrade.

Question arising from these developments: If the Yankees win the 2006 World Series, will the Scott Brosius Fan Club, aka the psychotic wing of Yankees fandom, finally consider Alex Rodriguez worthy of his roster spot, or will they claim the team won in spite of him?

All along, despite mediot goading*, the chances of the Yankees trading Rodriguez have been about the same as the chances Lindsay Lohan will call my cell tonight: technically possible, but, in reality, impossible. Why should they trade him? He slumped badly in June, and any smug bassbowl trying to justify the booing at that time would only have to insist that New York fans are a "what have you done for me lately?" crowd. However, the guy has been tremendous in July, walloping the ball to a 308/388/549 clip. The booing is uncalled for, and it's shameful (or hilarious, I guess, depending on your point of view) how a minority of Yankees fans are making the whole group look like a bunch of yokels.

ANYWAY, just to nail the point home, here, in alphabetical order by team name, is a list of what each MLB team would have to give up for ARod in trade. Zach, Ben, and I have already gone through the Mariners, Mets, and Giants, respectively, and you can follow the links below to more detailed reasoning for those trade proposals.

So, members of the Scott Brosius Fan Club (he of the career 95 OPS+), so that I'm clear, none of these deals will ever happen. You're "stuck" with ARod. Get over yourselves. The rest of MLB fandom hates you with a passion.

The The Angels Angels of Anaheim
Angels get: ARod
Yankees get: Howie Kendrick, Ervin Santana, Scot Shields, and Joe Saunders
Instant offense for the Halos, while the Yanks get a rookie replacement 2B/3B, two MLB-ready starters who would actually improve the back end of the rotation this year, and one of the top three setup guys in the majors.

Astros
Astros get: ARod
Yankees get: Roy Oswalt, Jason Lane, and Felipe Paulino
ARod plays SS, the offense is suddenly one of the best in the NL, and while losing Oswalt is huge, in order to get ARod now and for the future, they'll take their chances with Clemens and Pettitte leading the rotation. The Yankees would get a top-flight starter who is locked up for at least one more year, a slugging outfielder who could be the first bat off the bench, and a raw minor league fireballer.

Athletics
A's get: ARod, $8 million
Yankees get: Barry Zito, Dan Johnson, Jay Payton, and Mark Ellis
ARod plays SS, Crosby moves to 2B, and Daric Barton takes over at 1B with Swisher moving back to the OF full time. For the Yankees, Zito shores up the rotation, Johnson replaces Andy Phillips, Payton starts in LF until Matsui gets back, at which point he replaces Melky Cabrera off the bench, and Mark Ellis takes over 3B and hits ninth (which is a huge downgrade offensively, but the rest of the upgrade might make it worthwhile for this season).

Blue Jays
Blue Jays get: ARod
Yankees get: Dustin McGowan, Alex Rios, Reed Johnson, Eric Hinske, and Ted Lilly.
New York's OF problem gets solved right away with two guys who will also command a pretty penny in trade talks after the season, Abreu can even DH until either Matsui or Sheffield gets back, Lilly is a big improvement on the back of the rotation, McGowan is a highly-touted pitching prospect, and Hinske is a good-enough 3B stopgap (who can't hit lefties to save his life) until Eric Duncan is ready. For Toronto, ARod plays SS, Aaron Hill takes over 2B permanently, Frank Catalanotto mans RF, and Wayne Lydon comes up to play LF.

Braves
Braves get: ARod
Yankees get: Tim Hudson, Edgar Renteria, and Jarrod Saltalamacchia
You know what? I'm tired of justifying all these trades, and I'm on deadline. You can figure out how it benefits each team, and call shenanigans if I put together a stupid deal from here on out.

Brewers
Brewers get: ARod
Yankees get: Geoff Jenkins, Doug Davis, Dana Eveland, Jeff Cirillo, and Rickie Weeks

Cardinals
Cards get: ARod
Yankees get: Mark Mulder, Jason Marquis, Jim Edmonds, Scott Speizio, and Colby Rasmus

Cubs
Cubs get: ARod
Yankees get: Aramis Ramirez, Mark Prior, Scott Eyre, and Juan Pierre

Devil Rays
Rays get: ARod
Yankees get: Jorge Cantu, Rocco Baldelli, Elijah Dukes, J.P. Howell, and Edwin Jackson

Diamondbacks
DBacks get: ARod
Yankees get: Shawn Green, Luis Gonzalez, Orlando Hudson, Miguel Batista, Luis Vizcaino, and Jorge Julio

Dodgers
Dodgers get: ARod
Yankees get: Derek Lowe, Chad Billingsley, Wilson Betemit, and Kenny Lofton

Giants

Indians
Tribe gets: ARod
Yankees get: Jake Westbrook, Jason Michaels, Rafael Betancourt, Casey Blake, and Jeremy Guthrie

Mariners

Marlins
Fish get: ARod
Yankees get: Josh Willingham, Dan Uggla, Anibal Sanchez, Scott Olsen, and Joe Borowski

Mets

Nationals
Nats get: ARod
Yankees get: Soriano, Vidro, Bill Bray and Alex Escobar

Orioles
O's get: ARod
Yankees get: Tejada, Erik Bedard

Padres
Pad People get: ARod
Yankees get: Dave Roberts, Mike Piazza, Woody Williams, Bobby Hill, and Adrian Gonzalez

Phillies
Phils get: ARod
Yankees get: Jon Lieber, Aaron Rowand, Jimmy Rollins and Pat Burrell

Pirates
Bucs get: ARod
Yankees get: Freddy Sanchez, Craig Wilson, Oliver Perez, Ian Snell, and Mike Gonzalez

Rangers
Rangers get: Three hundred gun-totin' vigilantes storming Arlington
Yankees get: Brian Cashman hanging up the phone, debating whether or not to send choppers for Jon Daniels's body

Red Sox
BoSox get: ARod, Jason Giambi
Yankees get: Manny, Papi
(If Ben Broussard can take down USSMariner, then this trade might collapse the entire interweb.)

Reds
Reds get: ARod
Yankees get: Ryan Freel, Junior, Bronson Arroyo, and Bill Bray

Rockies
Rox get: ARod
Yankees get: Clint Barmes, Garrett Atkins, Aaron Cook, Brian Fuentes, and Todd Helton

Royals
Royals get: You get nothing! You lose! Good day sir!
Yankees get: N/A

Tigers
Tigers get: ARod
Yankees get: Carlos Guillen, Kenny Rogers, Magglio, and Zach Miner

Twins
Twinkies get: ARod
Yankees get: Brad Radke, Boof Bonser, Jason Kubel, Jason Bartlett, and Michael Cuddyer

White Sox
ChiSox get: ARod
Yankees get: Javier Vazquez, Scott Podsednik, Ray Liotta, and Josh Fields

You still with me? Congratulations. Without even taking into account salary considerations, you see what a foolish move it would be to trade ARod.

*I couldn't pass this up: Steve Phillips did a 5 Questions bit for the New York Post. The logic he gave for trading ARod is as follows: This has been going on for two years. The problem is that reality doesn't mean anything. There is this notion that he never hits in the clutch. There is this notion that A-Rod never makes a play. He has actually hit with runners in scoring position. I just don't think people are ever going to give him a break in New York... I just don't see how he is going to get out of [the abuse] in New York. If being the MVP, if being the Player of the Month, doesn't do it, then he is not going to do it. What happens is you see his performance start to deteriorate because he does care and he wants to earn the fans' respect. In other words, ARod's been abused by fans for two years and has been the AL MVP and won Player of the Month awards, but the booing obviously affects him. Yes, Steve. Clearly, he's just a shell of a baseball player because of the booing.